I think I need help.
Mostly I need someone to empathize with me and tell me I'm not the only one that has these feelings.
A couple months ago we had a 5th Sunday lesson about the postivies of the internet. I'm really grateful for that lesson because otherwise I might get overwhelmed with how negativly the internet can influence me.
What I mean is that I get bombarded (okay its probably my fault for reading blogs all the time and browsing facebook) with everyone's success stories and then sit back and think, "what the heck? am I not doing enough with my life?"
Does anyone else get discouraged about this? Or ask if these people are even real?
I understand that people aren't going to post about their failures and short comings for the most part. Heck--I haven't posted in a couple months because I haven't felt I have anything to "talk" (alright, I mean brag) about right now. But why is that the case? Why do we fear what others will think of us? Why have we defined success by how busy we are?
I already have answers to all these questions, and tomrrow I'm sure I'll feel my normal self again. But for now I feel like I need to take a stance against the world.
My name is Heather. I don't have the patience to sew perfect lines for quilts. I don't have a smart phone yet. My face still breaks out more than I would like it to. And that is okay!
--Let's be honest, I've been blessed with way more than I deserve.
Fall Update
7 years ago
6 comments:
heather i feel the exact same way you do and i know that most women do too. i feel guilty when i am just relaxing. but to tell you the truth, we're too poor right now for me to make lots of fun crafts or extravagant meals or for us to do really exciting things. i am working and craig is going to school but that's about it. we don't have anything really "exciting" in our lives right now. and i also sometimes feel like i am not doing enough with my life. i usually blog about just normal day things sometimes and i like to read those posts from other people too. so you should find time to just blog about the normal things going on in your life because i really enjoy reading your blog. i laughed when you said you don't have a smart phone yet because i don't either and i feel like craig and i are the only ones that don't. anyways, just know that you are not alone :)
Heather! I don't have a smart phone. And I do sew quilts but my lines are nowhere near perfect.
I feel the exact same way you do, that everyone must have more exciting lives than me/perhaps I am a giant failure.
But I think most everybody feels like that when comparing their worst to someone else's best.
Thanks for sharing this!
(P.S. This is Sarah, for some reason I can't figure out how to put my name on the comment)
The timing of this was uncanny. Look for an email from me in the next day or two.
Love you. And I agree. I went to a baby shower last night in our ward, and it was so darling, but i wondered how our expectations of everything would change if pinterest just suddenly blew up (or whatever you call an internet site internally combusting). Women and girls had a hard enough time comparing ourselves to each other without Facebook, blogs, and pinterest.
I was talking to Tyler recently about feeling lame cause I didn't have a fancy blog with posts about how awesome my homemade food/clothes/furniture/etc is, and he laughed and said he'd be worried if I did. Hahaha, I wish I had a boy's perspective sometimes.
But I agree, I think you've helped inspire me to take a break from technology. I might try going a whole day or two without using my phone or getting online. I think I would enjoy the "reboot" haha.
You are definitely not alone in this. Oh man, I remember being so depressed for a while maybe about a year ago when I sat and compared myself with a bunch of girls I knew that had gone off and done fun things with their husbands (you were on that list! Remember how you guys lived it up in Belgium?!) My husband and I had a big exciting vacation last month to... Arizona. And I don't foresee anything more exciting on the horizon for at least a few years. We'll be in Provo for a while longer and then in Salt Lake for at least three more years. Oh and then there were the 8 years where I wasn't married and all my friends were... that wasn't fun. Even now there are a million other things I wish I could do (like work in this country, or afford new clothes?) Anyway, I'm just telling you all this because you need to remember how exciting your life has been in the past and how it may even be that way in the future, and that it can always be awesome. I read this talk by elder holland a while back and I loved it so much. It made me realize how horrible pinterest can be. I highly recommend it. Here's a bit from it:
“In a world that constantly compares people, ranking them as more or less intelligent, more or less attractive, more or less successful, it is not easy to really believe in a [divine] love that does not do the same. When I hear someone praised,” he says, “it is hard not to think of myself as less praiseworthy; when I read about the goodness and kindness of other people, it is hard not to wonder whether I myself am as good and kind as they; and when I see trophies, rewards, and prizes being handed out to special people, I cannot avoid asking myself why that didn’t happen to me.”
Here's the link: http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2002/04/the-other-prodigal?lang=eng&cid=email-shared
Sorry for the novel of a comment. Just know that most of us feel the exact same way. Oh, and if you're ever feeling down, go back and read your old blog posts of times that were a little more exciting. That always picks me up and reminds me of how lucky I have been.
Much love! You're pretty great. And if you ever want to do DIY ombre skinny jeans or make a chevron maxi skirt or invent a new cupcake flavor or make 85 freezer meals in 4 hours just give me a call and we'll show the world who's awesome.
Heather feather! i think everyone feels this way. At the end of the day there will always be someone more successful and 'doing more' with their lives. luh you! hope i see you sooooon.
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